grief companion

Making it Matter that it Did! Sharing a Toolkit that Helped Me my First Year of Grief

Our vet thought the same.

Then the next seizure happened a few weeks later. And, well, you know what soon followed.

A German Shorthair Named Roo

If only Cancer had not entered home

I still remember when my husband told me that Roo had just had a small seizure. If only it had been because her passion to chase a squirrel overrode her incredible smarts to not overdo it in the heat.

On September 14, 2014, our dear Roo became our guardian angel above. And I began year one of a very deep journey with grief. And healing.

How I believe is that as much as we wish the ebbs of life did not have to happen, we are given gifts from those moments if we choose to see. One of the gifts was that I could perform my work from home during the last days of Roo’s life on Earth. I could be fully present with every moment she moved, watched, smelled, ate, drank, slept. Breathed.

In the deepest part of my soul, I knew there was another gift I was being given. I knew there was a bigger purpose in Roo experiencing Cancer. I knew she was whispering to me to make it matter that it was happening. And when she was no longer physically beside me, to make it matter that it did.

A few weeks before we learned Roo was sick, her and I were on one of our daily runs. We came up on a gentleman motioning for us to stop and look up into the nearby tree branch. Looking back at us was an Owl. The gentleman continued on his way and Roo and I stayed. The owl talked to us with many whoooo’s, it let me take pictures, and then when it decided to fly, it flew just a few feet above Roo and me, wings outstretched, a canopy momentarily shading our heads. I felt something powerful had happened in that moment, though I would not know just how significant until a few weeks later.

Fast forward to the week after Roo had left Earth and I found a bravery to go to the trail where her and I had gone for our daily runs. Before I stepped onto the trail, I had asked Roo to send me a sign she was still by my side. I was starting this journey believing space does not separate us from the ones I love. My first-year journey with Grief deepened this belief.

When I got to that spot on the trail where Roo and I had saw the Owl, I paused, so certain I would see the Owl. When it didn’t appear, I continued to the turnaround point at the trail’s end and came back by the same spot. I stopped, felt every crack in my heart trying to dam up the tears, and then there it was, flying towards me, to land in the tree branch next to me. The owl. A sign from Roo.

One of many I would hear and see over the course of the next year.

If I had a magic wand to ease your grief – or even better, if I could wave it so that you did not have to lose your best friend, that wand would be yours. Since I cannot, I would like to offer to you a tool kit of ways I found to breathe again after Roo left Earth in the hopes that at least one of these tools can be of benefit to you on your walk with Grief.

What you will receive:

• A free instruction sheet to guide your first 30 days.

• A free PDF of 30 journal lined pages to download and print or save to your computer.

• Each journal page contains an inspirational quote for the day (often a quote would cross my path at “just the right time”)

• A free electronic copy of To the Moon and Back to Me to use as a reference guide as you find your own signs that space is not separating you from your best friend.

• A free 15-minute 1x1 session with me via Zoom or Microsoft Teams or the option to engage in email dialogue to ask questions or share about your journey.

It is so little when your heart has been cracked or shattered. Yet, if it is of assistance to you, a purpose of Roo and my journey will have been achieved.


Making it Matter that it Did! Sharing a Toolkit that Helped Me my First Year of Grief

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